Post by grayscar on Apr 22, 2014 18:20:55 GMT -6
Grayscar
36 moons || straight || Medicine Cat
Go on! Get out of my head36 moons || straight || Medicine Cat
I'm on the wrong side
of a parallel universe
gray scar-covered tom with amber eyes.
Face: Grayscar has a long, narrow, triangular face with small rounded ears that have tufts on the ends. His eyes are neither close or far away from each other which is a good thing. His eyes are kind of big though and are the brightest of ambers there is. Being a tabby he had a dark M on his forehead, part of the M ends at each corner of his eyes so in other words the M that marks him as a tabby is in-between his eyes. For a cat who's face is kind of long he sure does have a flat nose. His nose is an unattractive pale gray that doesn't really stand out much and he had long clear whiskers that help him with his balance.
Body: Grayscar is a large tom with scars criss-crossing his pelt. His fur is a dark gray color with streaks of white running through it. His fur is long and thick protecting him from the chills of leafbare but making him uncomfortable in the hotter season of Greenleaf. His fur is also really thick and fluffy never having lost it's kit-like softness. The fur on his chest tends to stick out on it's own no matter how much he grooms his chest fur, it always sticks out. His legs are long which is what makes him look so large or tall. He is also well-muscled making it clear that if he had become a warrior his strong point would have been fighting. The fur along his stomach is actually a light gray as well as his paws except for his left forepaw, which is dark gray like the rest of his pelt.
Extra: Grayscar might be covered in scars but since his fur is long and thick, his fur covers most of them hiding them from view. Though there are a few scars that can easily be seen. For one thing he has a scar over his left eye that his mother gave to him. He also has a scar that starts at his chin, wraps around his neck, and ends at the opposite shoulder, this scar is thanks to his father. He has long hooked claws and long canine teeth good for tearing flesh.
Entire appearance: Grayscar is a large, scar-covered tom with amber eyes. He has a long, narrow, triangular face with small rounded ears that have tufts on the ends. His eyes are neither to far-away from each other or to-close to each other, though they are kind of big. Being a tabby he had a dark M on his forehead, part of the M ends at each corner of his eyes so in other words the M that marks him as a tabby is in-between his eyes. For a cat who's face is kind of long he sure does have a flat nose. His nose is an unattractive pale gray that doesn't really stand out much and he had long clear whiskers that help him with his balance. His fur is a dark gray color with streaks of white running through it. He has long legs which is what makes him look so large or tall, he is also well-muscled. The toms fur is long and fluffy having never lost its kit-like softness. His long, thick fur protects him from the chills of Leafbare but makes him uncomfortable in the hotter season of Greenleaf. The fur on his chest tens to stick out on it's own no matter how much he grooms it, it always sticks out. Grayscar has many scars though most of them can't be seen since they are hidden by his pelt. There is actually two scars that can be seen by others. For one thing he has a scar over his left eye that his mother gave to him and the other scar which starts at his chin, wraps around his neck, and ends at the opposite shoulder came from his father. The fur along his stomach is actually a light gray as well as his paws except for his left forepaw which is a dark gray like the rest of his pelt. The tom has long hooked claws and long canine teeth good for tearing flesh.
PERSONALITY
Positive side:
Brave, clever, Good at problem solving, good listener, Helpful, Honest, Loyal
Heart of a Lion: Grayscar is a really brave tom, he isn't afraid to stand up for what he believes or to voice his thoughts out loud. He isn't afraid to get onto cats if he sees that they or doing something wrong, and if he seems a cat doing something they aren't suppose to he'll scold them to no end. He isn't afraid to speak out against his leader if he thinks his leader is wrong or if he thinks any cat is wrong for that matter, however; if he thinks his leader is right he'll defend him against any cat who thinks their leader is wrong. It might surprise people but if the tom sees a cat getting picked on he'll defend the cat who is getting picked on, and isn't afraid to cuff the bully on the ears if he has to. He doesn't like when cats is bullied and if he had to he would defend his clan to no end even if that isn't what he is meant to do he will do it.
The thinker: It might come as a surprise but Grayscar is quite the clever cat. Another way of purring it is to say he isn't dumb and is quick to understand. He learns fast and has great memory which comes in handy when he has to learn a lot of stuff. He is also good at thinking of ideas and voicing his ideas doesn't really bother him. Be able to think your way through things is the most important think to the tom. If he wasn't able to think of ideas he really wouldn't know what to do with his life.
The solution giver: Grayscar is good a problem solving so if his clan mates have problems they can just come to him and ask him for help. He will listen to any of his clan mates problems and will come up with a solution that will help them to solve their problem. I must admit though he might be good at problem solving but he has never been in love so if your having trouble with your love life, it wouldn't be a good idea to come to him. For any other problem he is good to go an he would help his clan mate come up with a solution to their problem even if it was the last thing he did.
The listener: Grayscar might not look it but he is a good listener and likes listening to the problem of his clan mates. If you want to pore out your heart to him go ahead he'll hang onto your every word like his life depends on it. This quality alone might make him a good friend if he even cared about getting a friend. If you confide in him with a secret he will keep it for you and won't tell anyone as long as it doesn't mean endangering the clan. If he thinks keeping a secret could endanger the clan he'll tell his leader.
The Helper- Grayscar is a very helpful tom who likes helping cats, no matter who they are, even if they weren't cats in his own clan he would still help him. He enjoys helping cats from the youngest kit to the oldest elder. If he has to he will even do some of the apprentice task. Like cleaning out the elders den and the nursery, or checking the elders for tick,s of course; the way he sees it, that is the task of a medicine cat anyway.
The truth counts: Grayscar is a very honest tom and couldn't tell a lie to save his life but maybe that is a good thing because you know he isn't just trying to make you feel better. He is brutally honest and will tell the truth even if the truth hurts. To him the truth counts for everything so he can't stand lying or for that matter being lied to. If you end up lying to him and he finds out it may be hard to regain his trust. Telling the truth is one of the most important things to Grayscar.
The faithful: Grayscar is really loyal if he has friends he remains loyal to them and would never betray them, after all he isn't his parents. The tom is loyal to his clan and would die for his clan if he had to meaning he would die protecting his clan if he had to. Loyalty is everything to Grayscar, and the tom isn't a very big fan of disloyal cats. He is also loyal to the warrior code and would never break the warrior code. In his opinion the warrior code is there to be followed not to be broken.
Negative side
Low self-esteem, Rude, Pessimistic, Trust-issues, Easily guilty
No ones perfect: Not only does Grayscar lack confidence but he also lacks self-esteem meaning that the tom has low self-esteem. Grayscar tends to believe every negative thing a clan mate says about him and tends to not believe the positive things that are said about him. He is always looking for approval from every one around him and his lack of self-esteem starts as far back as his kit-hood.
The Offensive: Grayscar can come off as rude sometimes, but usually it is only when someone ask him about his past or when his past is brought up. He becomes offensive if anyone even talks about his past, it is something he can't help since he tends to think his clan mates would start comparing him to his parents. If he becomes snippy when his past comes up he thinks that is a way to make his clan mates drop the matter.
Mr. Negative: Grayscar is very pessimistic having a negative view on life. Maybe it's because of his past but the medicine cat is very negative. His negativeness might lead him to being blunt when talking to his clan mates. Thankfully his negative attitude on life, hasn't led him to being paranoid.
The emotionally scarred: Grayscar could be considered emotionally scarred, though that is another way of saying he has trust-issues. He has a hard time trusting others, and will usually put up walls around himself so that he won't be hurt. He thinks that if he gets close to someone, he'll just end up getting hurt.
The illicit: Grayscar is easily guilty especially over stuff that his clan mates might not understand. If someone who is caring for dies he immediately feels guilty. Maybe he shouldn't blame himself for everything that happens, but he really can't help himself. He especially feels guilty over Smokes deaf, a rogue who took care of him when his own parents wouldn't.
Neutral side:
Calm, Merciful, Quiet, Reserved, Sarcastic, Serious
The serene: Grayscar is calm choosing to not panic when most cats would panic. This is a good trait for a medicine cat because it means if a cat is seriously injured, he can keep his cool and treat the cat. He is the kind of cat who would try and keep others from panicking by being reassuring.
The forgiver: Though is probably doesn't make since he has forgiven his parents for all the pain they have caused him and doesn't want revenge against them. Which is probably why he hurts so much every time he realizes he was the reason behind his fathers death. He things killing is the greatest of sins and always tries his best to make up for killing his father even if some would say his father deserved to die.
Silence is the key: Grayscar is quiet, though most would call him the strong silent type, because that is exactly what he is. He chooses to speak when he absolutely has to, of course if a clan mate of his ask him a question he will answer. He sees it as rude, not to answer a question. He prefers silence to talking and usually does his work without talking, he actually sees talking as a waste of time.
The emotionless: Grayscar is reserved meaning he really doesn't show his emotions all that well. He prefers keeping his emotions hidden tending to think, that emotions are a weaknesses. He thinks that if he doesn't allow himself to feel any emotions, that he won't end up getting hurt. He usually keeps his face as an emotionless mask and tries his best to keep his emotions out of his eyes.
The ironic: Grayscar tends to speak with sometimes it because annoying but he does know when he should stop with the sarcasm. Usually he gets sarcastic when a clan mate or a cat from another clan ask his a question that he sees as stupid, a question he thinks that everyone should know the answer to. He also tends to get sarcastic when a cat whines over nothing but that doesn't mean he still won't help the cat.
The solemn: Grayscar is a very serious tom sometimes coming off as solemn or grim to his clan mates. He is very serious about his work and if he has a very ill-patient he'll stay awake through the night keeping an eye on the patient. Another word for his seriousness could be dedicated. It is obvious to everyone that he is very dedicated to his work, and takes being a medicine cat seriously.
Likes: healing his clan mates, sorting herbs, gathering herbs, learning about herbs, sunrise
Dislikes: being unable to do anything for his clan mates, fighting, death, sunset, bad dreams
Fears: his parents, water, sleeping
HISTORY
- Before life: A long time ago before the four warrior clans had fallen two cats met secretly one of the cats was from Windclan and the other one was from Thunderclan. The two cats continued to meet in secret not wanting their clan mates to bring them up and keep them from seeing each other after all the two young cats were in love. The more the two met with each the more in love they became until finally Coldstep who was from Thunderclan found out that she was expecting Quickrunners(who was from windclan) kits. The two were overjoyed but they were also worried about what their kits would think of, of growing up without a father so Quickrunner moved to his mates clan so that he could see his kits be born. Soon enough Coldstep gave birth to three kits naming them Dustkit, Daisykit, and Rabbitkit. Dustkit and Rabbitkit ended up dying of greencough when they were only a moon old and Daisykit disappeared when she was six moons old right before her apprentice ceremony and was never seen by her clan mates again. Daisykit changed her name to just Daisy and met a nice loner who she had a kit with. They had one son that the named Thistle who got together with another loner named Claws who ended up giving birth to a little she-cat who they named Rose. Rose was their only daughter and maybe if Thistle and Claws hadn't been killed by a badger when Rose was only nine moons old she wouldn't have grown into such a cold bitter cat. Rose ended up growing into a cold bitter cat and ended up meeting a tom who was just as cold and bitter as she was. The loners name was Sky and even though Sky and Rose didn't really seem to like each other they still became mates it was unexpected when Rose found out that she was expecting kits. She didn't like kits and neither did Sky, but it wasn't like they could do anything about it and soon enough, Rose ended up giving birth to four kits. She named the two toms Gray and Thorn and she named the two she-cats Crow and Flower.
Kit hood: Gray was born to two loners named Rose and Sky along with two sisters named Crow and Flower and one brother who he was very close to named Thorn. Rose and Sky were always fighting of course their fighting or bickering would wake their kits. When the arguing of their parents woke Gray's siblings he was always their to comfort them putting aside his own fear. The bickering got worse as the kits got older so Gray would try to distract his siblings with games like mossball or tag. When the kits were three moons old Gray and his siblings were playing a game of mossball when their mother suddenly stormed into the nursery madder than ever. When Sky saw her kits playing a game of mossball, she flew into a rage and attacked her own kits. Soon enough, only Gray was left, he was horrified at what his mother had done and he attacked her. Gray was easily batted aside and his mother was able to pin him down and claw him over his left eye, but before she could kill him a passing rogue burst into the den and dragged her out. Then the rogue chased away Gray's parents, before taking Gray with him planning to raise the kit as his own.
Later on in life: Smokey, who was the name of the rogue, who had saved him started to raise Gray as his own, always keeping an eye on the growing tom. Smokey became like a father to Gray, unlike his real father Sky, the rogue was willing to do anything for Gray. Knowing Gray would need to learn how to survive, Smokey started to teach him how to hunt and fight though Gray had a little trouble with the whole fighting thing. As in he didn't take learning how to fight seriously and often refused to learn how to fight. When Gray was ten moons old his father found him again and attacked him almost killing him. Luckily Smokey was nearby and once again, Smokey chased a way Sky, and took Gray to a twoleg to get cured since he knew nothing about herbs. Gray spend only a short time in twoleg place but was still able to learn about catmint before Smokey was able to get him out. Once again Smokey tried to teach Gray how to fight, but this time the young tom actually took fighting seriously and stopped refusing to learn. When he was 20 moons old Smokey went off to do some solo hunting promising to be back by sunhigh. Sunhigh passed and soon enough the sun was sinking in the sky, but Smokey had yet to return. Worried Gray went to go look for the rogue who had taken care of him and found him lying dead under a tree, it was clear that he had been killed by another cat. Before he could do anything he was attacked and was easily pinned down thanks to the fact he hadn't seen the attack coming. Looking up he spotted his own father standing over him, it was clear he had been the one to kill Smokey. Seeing his father raise his paw to deliver the death strike, Gray panicked and blindly lashed out at his father. He suddenly felt his father weight disappear and he scrambled to his paws staring down at his father horrified, as his father drew his last breath. Gray had just killed his own father and he didn't know what to do, even though his father had tried to kill him he had never been able to bring himself to hate his father. Even knowing his father had been responsible for Smokey's death, he still couldn't bring himself to hate his father. After burying his father and Smokey, he fled half the time not bothering to eat.
Clan life: When Gray stumbled onto Treeclan territory he was half-starved and barely able to stand up his condition was so bad. He was brought to the Treeclan camp where he cleaned up his act and starting behaving as a cat should, fighting for survival. He started eating again and groomed his fur, and after some rest he was as strong and healthy as he had once been. He had stumbled across Treeclan right when he had turned 35 moons, it had taken him a moon to recover, and when he had recovered, he had come to realize that the path of a Medicine cat was his to take.
SAMPLE
Fear pulsed through him, making his eyes shoot open to reveal wide amber eyes that were filled with fear at the moment, before returning to their usual emotionless state. The gray tom sat out in his nest, his breath still ragged as he got to his paws. He had, had the dream again, it was always the same dream every night. It made sleeping almost impossible, and if he was telling the truth he was afraid to sleep. He shook himself hoping to get rid of the clinging fear and pushed the dream to the back of his mind. He hated the dreams after all they all dealt with his past, and he always told himself that the past was the past. He just couldn't stop himself from remembering it, mainly the dreams were of him killing his own father, but sometime the dreams were of his mother killing his litter and trying to kill him. Every now and than he would dream of the time his father had tried to kill him when he was ten moons old. 'Why didn't they love me? What did I do wrong?' he asked himself the tip of his tail twitching. 'I need some fresh air,' he thought, before heading out of his den and into the clearing.
Looking around, Grayscar, headed out of camp pushing his way out of the camp entrance and into the territory. He felt better coming out into the territory. 'Now I can have some time to think,' he thought, heading deeper into the territory confident that he would be okay. He didn't think anything would happen to him, if he just went for a short walk to clear his mind. The tom scented the air to make sure nothing else was stirring before coming to a halt under a tree and laying down, his gaze fixed on the sky. He let his paws rest on his paws as he thought of his parents. He still couldn't understand why his parents hadn't been able to love him. He wished his siblings could be here with him, but he knew they were long gone, and there wasn't anyway that he would be able to see them again. He hadn't believed in the starry ancestors before he had joined Treeclan, none of his family had, so he knew he would never see his siblings again. He let out a sigh, thinking about what might have happened, if his siblings had lived.
"Maybe, I wouldn't be so keen to blame myself for everything," he muttered under his breath, dropping his gaze away from the sky. Even though his parents had always argued with each other, when he had been a kit, he had still trusted them, but they had betrayed his trust by trying to kill him. Another memory suddenly came to him one of him standing over his dead father, and he head back a wail. 'Why did things have to end the way they did?' he asked himself sheathing and unsheathing his claws. His parents might have betrayed his trust, but he had never been able to bring himself, to want revenge against them. Maybe it was because they were family, but the medicine cat still loved his parents, he just wished he could've made his parents change. 'I never meant to kill my father, if I could have, I would have made things right,' he thought digging his claws into the ground. He sheathed his claws, sitting up, remorse shooting through him as he remembered how he had comforted his siblings when they parents had fought, when he was a kit.
'I'm sorry I couldn't protect you,' he thought staring down at his paws flinching when he heard the sound of the undergrowth moving, making his head jerk up. He stared as a mouse came out, wondering why the prey would come out in the presence of a cat, until he realized that he was downwind. 'The prey doesn't even know I'm here he thought wondering if he should try and hunt it, but decided against it. 'Hunting was never my strong point,' he thought moving away from the mouse, heading back to camp. He made his way back to camp his thoughts still spinning as he pushed his way into the clearing. He wasn't tired, but he knew he should get some sleep while he could, 'What if the dreams return,' he asked himself a shudder passing through him. 'Bad dreams or not, you still need your sleep,' he told himself firmly.
Letting out a sigh, the medicine cat headed back to his den. He ducked into his den his eyes straying to his nest in the very back on the den. With a shake of his head he headed to his nest. Curling up into his nest he tried to banish the thoughts that continued to form in his mind. He knew if he couldn't stop thinking about the past, he wouldn't be able to get any sleep. He managed to push the past to the back of his mind and let his eyes close. 'Please let me have no dreams,' he silently begged before following into a deep sleep.
Face: Grayscar has a long, narrow, triangular face with small rounded ears that have tufts on the ends. His eyes are neither close or far away from each other which is a good thing. His eyes are kind of big though and are the brightest of ambers there is. Being a tabby he had a dark M on his forehead, part of the M ends at each corner of his eyes so in other words the M that marks him as a tabby is in-between his eyes. For a cat who's face is kind of long he sure does have a flat nose. His nose is an unattractive pale gray that doesn't really stand out much and he had long clear whiskers that help him with his balance.
Body: Grayscar is a large tom with scars criss-crossing his pelt. His fur is a dark gray color with streaks of white running through it. His fur is long and thick protecting him from the chills of leafbare but making him uncomfortable in the hotter season of Greenleaf. His fur is also really thick and fluffy never having lost it's kit-like softness. The fur on his chest tends to stick out on it's own no matter how much he grooms his chest fur, it always sticks out. His legs are long which is what makes him look so large or tall. He is also well-muscled making it clear that if he had become a warrior his strong point would have been fighting. The fur along his stomach is actually a light gray as well as his paws except for his left forepaw, which is dark gray like the rest of his pelt.
Extra: Grayscar might be covered in scars but since his fur is long and thick, his fur covers most of them hiding them from view. Though there are a few scars that can easily be seen. For one thing he has a scar over his left eye that his mother gave to him. He also has a scar that starts at his chin, wraps around his neck, and ends at the opposite shoulder, this scar is thanks to his father. He has long hooked claws and long canine teeth good for tearing flesh.
Entire appearance: Grayscar is a large, scar-covered tom with amber eyes. He has a long, narrow, triangular face with small rounded ears that have tufts on the ends. His eyes are neither to far-away from each other or to-close to each other, though they are kind of big. Being a tabby he had a dark M on his forehead, part of the M ends at each corner of his eyes so in other words the M that marks him as a tabby is in-between his eyes. For a cat who's face is kind of long he sure does have a flat nose. His nose is an unattractive pale gray that doesn't really stand out much and he had long clear whiskers that help him with his balance. His fur is a dark gray color with streaks of white running through it. He has long legs which is what makes him look so large or tall, he is also well-muscled. The toms fur is long and fluffy having never lost its kit-like softness. His long, thick fur protects him from the chills of Leafbare but makes him uncomfortable in the hotter season of Greenleaf. The fur on his chest tens to stick out on it's own no matter how much he grooms it, it always sticks out. Grayscar has many scars though most of them can't be seen since they are hidden by his pelt. There is actually two scars that can be seen by others. For one thing he has a scar over his left eye that his mother gave to him and the other scar which starts at his chin, wraps around his neck, and ends at the opposite shoulder came from his father. The fur along his stomach is actually a light gray as well as his paws except for his left forepaw which is a dark gray like the rest of his pelt. The tom has long hooked claws and long canine teeth good for tearing flesh.
PERSONALITY
Positive side:
Brave, clever, Good at problem solving, good listener, Helpful, Honest, Loyal
Heart of a Lion: Grayscar is a really brave tom, he isn't afraid to stand up for what he believes or to voice his thoughts out loud. He isn't afraid to get onto cats if he sees that they or doing something wrong, and if he seems a cat doing something they aren't suppose to he'll scold them to no end. He isn't afraid to speak out against his leader if he thinks his leader is wrong or if he thinks any cat is wrong for that matter, however; if he thinks his leader is right he'll defend him against any cat who thinks their leader is wrong. It might surprise people but if the tom sees a cat getting picked on he'll defend the cat who is getting picked on, and isn't afraid to cuff the bully on the ears if he has to. He doesn't like when cats is bullied and if he had to he would defend his clan to no end even if that isn't what he is meant to do he will do it.
The thinker: It might come as a surprise but Grayscar is quite the clever cat. Another way of purring it is to say he isn't dumb and is quick to understand. He learns fast and has great memory which comes in handy when he has to learn a lot of stuff. He is also good at thinking of ideas and voicing his ideas doesn't really bother him. Be able to think your way through things is the most important think to the tom. If he wasn't able to think of ideas he really wouldn't know what to do with his life.
The solution giver: Grayscar is good a problem solving so if his clan mates have problems they can just come to him and ask him for help. He will listen to any of his clan mates problems and will come up with a solution that will help them to solve their problem. I must admit though he might be good at problem solving but he has never been in love so if your having trouble with your love life, it wouldn't be a good idea to come to him. For any other problem he is good to go an he would help his clan mate come up with a solution to their problem even if it was the last thing he did.
The listener: Grayscar might not look it but he is a good listener and likes listening to the problem of his clan mates. If you want to pore out your heart to him go ahead he'll hang onto your every word like his life depends on it. This quality alone might make him a good friend if he even cared about getting a friend. If you confide in him with a secret he will keep it for you and won't tell anyone as long as it doesn't mean endangering the clan. If he thinks keeping a secret could endanger the clan he'll tell his leader.
The Helper- Grayscar is a very helpful tom who likes helping cats, no matter who they are, even if they weren't cats in his own clan he would still help him. He enjoys helping cats from the youngest kit to the oldest elder. If he has to he will even do some of the apprentice task. Like cleaning out the elders den and the nursery, or checking the elders for tick,s of course; the way he sees it, that is the task of a medicine cat anyway.
The truth counts: Grayscar is a very honest tom and couldn't tell a lie to save his life but maybe that is a good thing because you know he isn't just trying to make you feel better. He is brutally honest and will tell the truth even if the truth hurts. To him the truth counts for everything so he can't stand lying or for that matter being lied to. If you end up lying to him and he finds out it may be hard to regain his trust. Telling the truth is one of the most important things to Grayscar.
The faithful: Grayscar is really loyal if he has friends he remains loyal to them and would never betray them, after all he isn't his parents. The tom is loyal to his clan and would die for his clan if he had to meaning he would die protecting his clan if he had to. Loyalty is everything to Grayscar, and the tom isn't a very big fan of disloyal cats. He is also loyal to the warrior code and would never break the warrior code. In his opinion the warrior code is there to be followed not to be broken.
Negative side
Low self-esteem, Rude, Pessimistic, Trust-issues, Easily guilty
No ones perfect: Not only does Grayscar lack confidence but he also lacks self-esteem meaning that the tom has low self-esteem. Grayscar tends to believe every negative thing a clan mate says about him and tends to not believe the positive things that are said about him. He is always looking for approval from every one around him and his lack of self-esteem starts as far back as his kit-hood.
The Offensive: Grayscar can come off as rude sometimes, but usually it is only when someone ask him about his past or when his past is brought up. He becomes offensive if anyone even talks about his past, it is something he can't help since he tends to think his clan mates would start comparing him to his parents. If he becomes snippy when his past comes up he thinks that is a way to make his clan mates drop the matter.
Mr. Negative: Grayscar is very pessimistic having a negative view on life. Maybe it's because of his past but the medicine cat is very negative. His negativeness might lead him to being blunt when talking to his clan mates. Thankfully his negative attitude on life, hasn't led him to being paranoid.
The emotionally scarred: Grayscar could be considered emotionally scarred, though that is another way of saying he has trust-issues. He has a hard time trusting others, and will usually put up walls around himself so that he won't be hurt. He thinks that if he gets close to someone, he'll just end up getting hurt.
The illicit: Grayscar is easily guilty especially over stuff that his clan mates might not understand. If someone who is caring for dies he immediately feels guilty. Maybe he shouldn't blame himself for everything that happens, but he really can't help himself. He especially feels guilty over Smokes deaf, a rogue who took care of him when his own parents wouldn't.
Neutral side:
Calm, Merciful, Quiet, Reserved, Sarcastic, Serious
The serene: Grayscar is calm choosing to not panic when most cats would panic. This is a good trait for a medicine cat because it means if a cat is seriously injured, he can keep his cool and treat the cat. He is the kind of cat who would try and keep others from panicking by being reassuring.
The forgiver: Though is probably doesn't make since he has forgiven his parents for all the pain they have caused him and doesn't want revenge against them. Which is probably why he hurts so much every time he realizes he was the reason behind his fathers death. He things killing is the greatest of sins and always tries his best to make up for killing his father even if some would say his father deserved to die.
Silence is the key: Grayscar is quiet, though most would call him the strong silent type, because that is exactly what he is. He chooses to speak when he absolutely has to, of course if a clan mate of his ask him a question he will answer. He sees it as rude, not to answer a question. He prefers silence to talking and usually does his work without talking, he actually sees talking as a waste of time.
The emotionless: Grayscar is reserved meaning he really doesn't show his emotions all that well. He prefers keeping his emotions hidden tending to think, that emotions are a weaknesses. He thinks that if he doesn't allow himself to feel any emotions, that he won't end up getting hurt. He usually keeps his face as an emotionless mask and tries his best to keep his emotions out of his eyes.
The ironic: Grayscar tends to speak with sometimes it because annoying but he does know when he should stop with the sarcasm. Usually he gets sarcastic when a clan mate or a cat from another clan ask his a question that he sees as stupid, a question he thinks that everyone should know the answer to. He also tends to get sarcastic when a cat whines over nothing but that doesn't mean he still won't help the cat.
The solemn: Grayscar is a very serious tom sometimes coming off as solemn or grim to his clan mates. He is very serious about his work and if he has a very ill-patient he'll stay awake through the night keeping an eye on the patient. Another word for his seriousness could be dedicated. It is obvious to everyone that he is very dedicated to his work, and takes being a medicine cat seriously.
Likes: healing his clan mates, sorting herbs, gathering herbs, learning about herbs, sunrise
Dislikes: being unable to do anything for his clan mates, fighting, death, sunset, bad dreams
Fears: his parents, water, sleeping
HISTORY
- Before life: A long time ago before the four warrior clans had fallen two cats met secretly one of the cats was from Windclan and the other one was from Thunderclan. The two cats continued to meet in secret not wanting their clan mates to bring them up and keep them from seeing each other after all the two young cats were in love. The more the two met with each the more in love they became until finally Coldstep who was from Thunderclan found out that she was expecting Quickrunners(who was from windclan) kits. The two were overjoyed but they were also worried about what their kits would think of, of growing up without a father so Quickrunner moved to his mates clan so that he could see his kits be born. Soon enough Coldstep gave birth to three kits naming them Dustkit, Daisykit, and Rabbitkit. Dustkit and Rabbitkit ended up dying of greencough when they were only a moon old and Daisykit disappeared when she was six moons old right before her apprentice ceremony and was never seen by her clan mates again. Daisykit changed her name to just Daisy and met a nice loner who she had a kit with. They had one son that the named Thistle who got together with another loner named Claws who ended up giving birth to a little she-cat who they named Rose. Rose was their only daughter and maybe if Thistle and Claws hadn't been killed by a badger when Rose was only nine moons old she wouldn't have grown into such a cold bitter cat. Rose ended up growing into a cold bitter cat and ended up meeting a tom who was just as cold and bitter as she was. The loners name was Sky and even though Sky and Rose didn't really seem to like each other they still became mates it was unexpected when Rose found out that she was expecting kits. She didn't like kits and neither did Sky, but it wasn't like they could do anything about it and soon enough, Rose ended up giving birth to four kits. She named the two toms Gray and Thorn and she named the two she-cats Crow and Flower.
Kit hood: Gray was born to two loners named Rose and Sky along with two sisters named Crow and Flower and one brother who he was very close to named Thorn. Rose and Sky were always fighting of course their fighting or bickering would wake their kits. When the arguing of their parents woke Gray's siblings he was always their to comfort them putting aside his own fear. The bickering got worse as the kits got older so Gray would try to distract his siblings with games like mossball or tag. When the kits were three moons old Gray and his siblings were playing a game of mossball when their mother suddenly stormed into the nursery madder than ever. When Sky saw her kits playing a game of mossball, she flew into a rage and attacked her own kits. Soon enough, only Gray was left, he was horrified at what his mother had done and he attacked her. Gray was easily batted aside and his mother was able to pin him down and claw him over his left eye, but before she could kill him a passing rogue burst into the den and dragged her out. Then the rogue chased away Gray's parents, before taking Gray with him planning to raise the kit as his own.
Later on in life: Smokey, who was the name of the rogue, who had saved him started to raise Gray as his own, always keeping an eye on the growing tom. Smokey became like a father to Gray, unlike his real father Sky, the rogue was willing to do anything for Gray. Knowing Gray would need to learn how to survive, Smokey started to teach him how to hunt and fight though Gray had a little trouble with the whole fighting thing. As in he didn't take learning how to fight seriously and often refused to learn how to fight. When Gray was ten moons old his father found him again and attacked him almost killing him. Luckily Smokey was nearby and once again, Smokey chased a way Sky, and took Gray to a twoleg to get cured since he knew nothing about herbs. Gray spend only a short time in twoleg place but was still able to learn about catmint before Smokey was able to get him out. Once again Smokey tried to teach Gray how to fight, but this time the young tom actually took fighting seriously and stopped refusing to learn. When he was 20 moons old Smokey went off to do some solo hunting promising to be back by sunhigh. Sunhigh passed and soon enough the sun was sinking in the sky, but Smokey had yet to return. Worried Gray went to go look for the rogue who had taken care of him and found him lying dead under a tree, it was clear that he had been killed by another cat. Before he could do anything he was attacked and was easily pinned down thanks to the fact he hadn't seen the attack coming. Looking up he spotted his own father standing over him, it was clear he had been the one to kill Smokey. Seeing his father raise his paw to deliver the death strike, Gray panicked and blindly lashed out at his father. He suddenly felt his father weight disappear and he scrambled to his paws staring down at his father horrified, as his father drew his last breath. Gray had just killed his own father and he didn't know what to do, even though his father had tried to kill him he had never been able to bring himself to hate his father. Even knowing his father had been responsible for Smokey's death, he still couldn't bring himself to hate his father. After burying his father and Smokey, he fled half the time not bothering to eat.
Clan life: When Gray stumbled onto Treeclan territory he was half-starved and barely able to stand up his condition was so bad. He was brought to the Treeclan camp where he cleaned up his act and starting behaving as a cat should, fighting for survival. He started eating again and groomed his fur, and after some rest he was as strong and healthy as he had once been. He had stumbled across Treeclan right when he had turned 35 moons, it had taken him a moon to recover, and when he had recovered, he had come to realize that the path of a Medicine cat was his to take.
SAMPLE
Fear pulsed through him, making his eyes shoot open to reveal wide amber eyes that were filled with fear at the moment, before returning to their usual emotionless state. The gray tom sat out in his nest, his breath still ragged as he got to his paws. He had, had the dream again, it was always the same dream every night. It made sleeping almost impossible, and if he was telling the truth he was afraid to sleep. He shook himself hoping to get rid of the clinging fear and pushed the dream to the back of his mind. He hated the dreams after all they all dealt with his past, and he always told himself that the past was the past. He just couldn't stop himself from remembering it, mainly the dreams were of him killing his own father, but sometime the dreams were of his mother killing his litter and trying to kill him. Every now and than he would dream of the time his father had tried to kill him when he was ten moons old. 'Why didn't they love me? What did I do wrong?' he asked himself the tip of his tail twitching. 'I need some fresh air,' he thought, before heading out of his den and into the clearing.
Looking around, Grayscar, headed out of camp pushing his way out of the camp entrance and into the territory. He felt better coming out into the territory. 'Now I can have some time to think,' he thought, heading deeper into the territory confident that he would be okay. He didn't think anything would happen to him, if he just went for a short walk to clear his mind. The tom scented the air to make sure nothing else was stirring before coming to a halt under a tree and laying down, his gaze fixed on the sky. He let his paws rest on his paws as he thought of his parents. He still couldn't understand why his parents hadn't been able to love him. He wished his siblings could be here with him, but he knew they were long gone, and there wasn't anyway that he would be able to see them again. He hadn't believed in the starry ancestors before he had joined Treeclan, none of his family had, so he knew he would never see his siblings again. He let out a sigh, thinking about what might have happened, if his siblings had lived.
"Maybe, I wouldn't be so keen to blame myself for everything," he muttered under his breath, dropping his gaze away from the sky. Even though his parents had always argued with each other, when he had been a kit, he had still trusted them, but they had betrayed his trust by trying to kill him. Another memory suddenly came to him one of him standing over his dead father, and he head back a wail. 'Why did things have to end the way they did?' he asked himself sheathing and unsheathing his claws. His parents might have betrayed his trust, but he had never been able to bring himself, to want revenge against them. Maybe it was because they were family, but the medicine cat still loved his parents, he just wished he could've made his parents change. 'I never meant to kill my father, if I could have, I would have made things right,' he thought digging his claws into the ground. He sheathed his claws, sitting up, remorse shooting through him as he remembered how he had comforted his siblings when they parents had fought, when he was a kit.
'I'm sorry I couldn't protect you,' he thought staring down at his paws flinching when he heard the sound of the undergrowth moving, making his head jerk up. He stared as a mouse came out, wondering why the prey would come out in the presence of a cat, until he realized that he was downwind. 'The prey doesn't even know I'm here he thought wondering if he should try and hunt it, but decided against it. 'Hunting was never my strong point,' he thought moving away from the mouse, heading back to camp. He made his way back to camp his thoughts still spinning as he pushed his way into the clearing. He wasn't tired, but he knew he should get some sleep while he could, 'What if the dreams return,' he asked himself a shudder passing through him. 'Bad dreams or not, you still need your sleep,' he told himself firmly.
Letting out a sigh, the medicine cat headed back to his den. He ducked into his den his eyes straying to his nest in the very back on the den. With a shake of his head he headed to his nest. Curling up into his nest he tried to banish the thoughts that continued to form in his mind. He knew if he couldn't stop thinking about the past, he wouldn't be able to get any sleep. He managed to push the past to the back of his mind and let his eyes close. 'Please let me have no dreams,' he silently begged before following into a deep sleep.
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